Where have I been? What have I been doing? I am sure my absence on the blog hasn’t even registered with you, but once every year my mother may type in the address so this update is for her.

Obviously, I have been busy training hard for this new extreme sport:

I said this was for my mom, so I’ll spare you the description of my sweaty overweight body performing on the pole.

Honestly, I think these guys need to take it to the next level. There needs to be a big spring at the bottom of the pole. Is this more of a religion, than a sport? Ask the goats.

Thanks eckeletic!

Now, it’s quite probable most, if not all of you will agree with me when I say that the fashion industry has to be possibly the biggest waste of time, money and resources ever. In fact I would go so far as to say that it’s all a load of groin-based spheroids.

Finally, someone in the design side of the fashion world appears to agree with this. This is Andy Bates, a leatherworker (not that way! Stop it, you filthy minded buggers!) par excellance.
You see, it would appear that an artist by the name of Grayson Perry heard of Mr Bates (I’m not telling you again – no giggling at the back) and asked him to make a handbag especially for him.
I can see you’re thinking about the use of pronouns in that last sentence. Would it help if I said that this is a picture of Grayson Perry?

Yep. You can see where this is going now can’t you? Well, here’s the finished product.

No, it’s not a coincidence that it looks like that (isn’t the jingly Prince Albert a nice touch though?). Especially when you take into account the back of the bag looks like this.

For more information and some completely gratuitous close-ups, head on over to Trend de la Crème.

See this?

Fairly crude piece of sculpture, wouldn’t you say? Well, I think you need to cut Dalton Ghetti some slack, because he’s carved this entirely out of pencil lead. Yep. He’s whittled away the wooden casing and then painstakingly shaped the graphite (not lead, folks!).
If you thought that was good, take a gander at these:

How much patience does this Connecticut-based artist have? I mean, one of his pieces, involving interlocking hearts, took him over two damn years.
Go see more of his work over at I New Idea.

Climb onto my love rocket.

Fasten your belt seats and press play.

It’s not quite as good as the first Major Lazer video I posted, but it will still make your jaw drop because of its bizarreness.

Directed by Eric Wareheim

Edited and Animation by Fatalfarm

Art by Kevin O’Neill

Produced by Clark Reinking and Dave Kneebone

Styling by Amanny Ahmad

Makeup by Tara Loren

I don’t like milk. It tastes like it was meant for, I don’t know, baby cows maybe. So, I can only assume that this video is the result of drinking too much of that stuff.

via Daily What

This is slightly NSFW.

This is also very weird. So, I must share. He’s like Pinocchio, except something else grows.

via WTF Japan, Seriously?

He likes girls and hates milk, what’s the problem here? I like girls and hate milk, does that make me a perverted, mutant robot?

Oh.

Well, you learn something everyday.